I'm calling on every, single corporation and organization in this country to create a telecommuting plan for its workforce. I can't believe the government isn't mandating this, so, it seems it's up to Cranky Chick to do so. Cranky Chick hereby proclaims that any employer who CAN implement telecommuting and hasn't shall hereby be forced to watch Jerry Springer episodes back-to-back until compliance.

Anyone who's basic job is to answer telephones and sit in front of a computer all day can sure as hell do that from home. And if you have employees you can't trust to put in a day's work from home, then you have employees who aren't putting in a day's work from the office either. Don't kid yourselves.

With instant messenger, email and webcams, you're more than able to keep track of your employees who work from home. I know, I work mostly from home because I work for a kick-ass, progressive company who has a global workforce. My team members are located all over the world and none of us are slackers.

Why?

Because when you get the privilege of working from home, the last thing you want to do is lose it! You work twice as hard over longer hours with more enthusiasm because you want to keep the bosses happy so they'll keep YOU happy!

Any executive who hasn't figured out the merits of telecommuting isn't worth his salt and ought to be let go. This is 2008 and telecommuting can not only save a company from destruction, it's a damn sure way to help alleviate oil consumption, pollution and crowded roadways as well as give the American worker a little work-life balance.

Every company in America, now is your time to step up. Let's see those telecommuting policies. Now!

California man gets year in jail for abusing kitten.

Now, I hope this reject gets his head banged a few times in the slammer... and maybe something else banged too!

The crawl... you know the one... at the bottom of the TV screen... there's a national outcry to get rid of the thing but I'm telling you, I'd feel lost without it. I feel informed by the crawl. Entertained. Mesmerized. The crawl is my friend.

Without the crawl, I would have to watch Entertainment Tonight to find out the lattitude and longitude of Britney's last sighting.

Without the crawl, I might not know (at the exact moment it happens) that something has blown up. It's not there anymore. It's gone. And I know it. Because of... the crawl.

I believe the crawl exercises my mind... keeps me fresh... alert. Without the crawl, I'm a unitasker and unchallenged by the requirement to assimilate audio, video and text ALL at once.

Instead of getting rid of the crawl, I wish we could interact with it. I'd like to be able to ask the crawl questions... "Crawl, what is the meaning of life?"

I think the crawl knows.

It's all been said.

Blogging was a gift that a girl named Christine gave me back in 2002 when I asked the question, "Blogging? What is a blog and why do I want one?"

Bloggers have opened my eyes, made me question opinions I felt sure of and, as such, made me a better person and more critical thinker. For that I thank you so much. To all the wonderful friends I've made online, I hope you'll stay in touch - you mean the world to me.

If you'd like to keep in touch, email me:heytess @ gmail.com

The oil change... a scam dreamed up by mechanics to line their pockets.

Here's a fact, especially for the ladies who routinely get taken advantage of by this ploy:

The oil eventually runs out all by itself!! Then, you just put brand new oil in (after they've replaced your engine) and "ta da" you've saved the $24.50 for the oil "change".

They say you can't really comprehend a mother's love for her children until you've had your own. I don't think that's true.

I take my fondness for Girl Scout Thin Mints, combine that with the feeling I get when I see a puppy, add the euphoria of a Percocet and Jack Daniels cocktail and THAT must be how it feels to love a child.

Duh.

Cranky Chick may very well have fathered Anna Nicole's child.

Tonight, as I was singing in the car to one of my favorite CD's, it became ever so clear to me that I am the missing ingredient in Il Divo's successful recording career.

Most people sing to Elton John or Mariah Carey in the car. I do opera unabashedly. And, of course, I don't speak Italian so I'm kind of using phonics to fake my way through the songs. It sounds something like this, "MiaSOLOrigatoni la lasagnaPORmiFaluja".

One word of caution if you're going to try this in the car... do NOT... I repeat... do NOT turn the radio down suddenly while you're singing! Something about that completely distorts the acoustics and you'll sound like total SHIT!

I'm always interested to know what effect music has on people - how it influences their lives. This comment by "Bob" referencing the Moody Blues song, "Nights in White Satin" (one of my favorites) really struck me:

"Nights In White Satin" will ALWAYS make me think of the first girl I was in love with when I was 11 years old back in 1972. She liked me too but I was too shy and afraid at the time to tell her. I remember lying in bed at night listening to this song on my little tape recorder....crying because I was so in love with her. The line " Letters I've written never meaning to send" held so true for me. I wrote that girl many letters that I knew I would never give to her. She looked like an angel. In 1973 my family moved 200 miles away. I figured I would forget about her, but never did. I thought about her all through high school. I always told myself that after school when I had a decent job and car I would go back and find her. She was killed just a couple weeks before graduation in 1979. She probably never knew how I felt....The haunting melodies of this song are enough to put one in a trance without conjuring these memories. If this song comes on when someone else is in the room or in the car I have to turn it off....the emotions become unstoppable.
- Bob, Marinette, WI

"Given the amount of unjust suffering and unhappiness in the world, I am deeply grateful for, sometimes even perplexed by, how much misery I have been spared." ~ Dennis Prager

I have often felt the same way.

Quote found at Queer Conservative.